Great day

hahahaha .. Today is really a good day for me !! today is our(Edwin and Michelle ) off day .. hahaha .. we went for a movie .. movie was ok la .. well .. why is it a great day ... heheheheh .. because he sayang me lo .. although didnt really sayang me very muchbut sad but at least it's more than what i expected .. hahaha .. enough la .. like what he always said .. Must always be contented of life .. hehehehe ... but saddienya .. no time for shopping .. we went there walk around parkson .. then went to my working place (sisley and united colors of bennetton) i showed him the blouse that i wanna buy .. and he said nice .. haihz ..should i buy ?really really dunno should i buy .. the price is rm 299.90 .. so must think properly first coz i always buy clothes but dont wear.. why coz regret .. so MUST think properly first .. hehehe .. u knw.. i really miss shopping alot .. i really must shop like mad after 13th of August which is THE DAY I'M FREE .. FREEDOM !!! dont need to work anymore .. really cant wait for that day .. haihz ... still got twenty days ... haihz !!! sad sad nya .. Why my parents have to force me to work ?!!why ?!! trust me .. IT'S SO NOT FUN !!!! you got no freedom at all !! you have tofollow the rules !! even the time you wanna go for break also must follow !! so stupid ! what kind of stupid rules ?! stupid parkson !!!!i got scolded by parkson's floor executive before k and the best part is it's NOT MY FAULT !!! but i also got scold her back ..by right she cannot scold me wan !!! i'm not her staff !! i'm not parkson's stff but sisley and united colors of benneton's staff !! stupid floor executive .. I WILL REMEMBER YOU !! the day i stop working will be the day you're gonna die !! hehehehe !!! i will complain bout you like shit !now cannot yet .. well .. haihz .. miss my bf !! so sad !! i want my bf to be here now !! i want ! i want ! i want ! that PIG is sleeping .. everytime eat sleep play eat sleep play .. hehehe .. just kidding ..hhaha .. he's now working in Sri Melaka .. hehehe .. lovie him sowie muchie .. he really very sayang me but some times we quarrel alot .. hmm should i say some times ?hmm .. no no ... should say all the time .. hehehe .. but no matter how many times we quarrel also my feelings for him WILL NEVER chnage coz i trust that i wouldnt find such a good bf ..you know those one in a million .. but the most important thing is that i woulnt find such special feelings anymore .. as in my feelings towards him .. that's why i said in the previous blog that no matter he dump me not i'll always and still loves him forever even if my future husband is not him .. haha . bad rite hhehe . what to do ? hehehe .. i really love him like mad .. i have five ex (does not include Vincent ) not even one of them included vincent i have ever had this special feelings the first day i saw them .. edwinie(his new name .. cute hor?) different ..really really really love him like maddie ..

sadness of life

today i really felt damn sum thung .. he can say that to me .. i felt so cheap aand betrayed .. i really feel very sad .. all the while i trusted him that he'll love me forever .. no matter what he did also i still trust him .. but now i dont think so .. i think that it's just me alone ,michelle alone wants this relationship to last forever .. stupid rite ?.. well .. i used to say gurl who trust their bf if they said that to them is stupid .. now i myself did that .. i'm so stupid .. i know how it feels n understnad why they trust their bf .. because this is love .. true love .. but guys often play with all this .. i shoulnt say the gurls are stupid .. i should say the guys are stupid .. they will never know what's true love .. i really love my bf like mad but he doesnt trust n give me all sort of nonsense that's damn hurting... i really dont care whether he's my ideal bf or not .. i love him .. love him like mad .. it's already better than being my ideal bf .. to me ideal bf is just in the category of luxury whereas the guy that i really love like mad until i can sacrifice is in the category of necessary .. that's what i really want .. a guy that i really love like mad n also he really love me .. not just the ideal one .. without luxury in someone's life the person still can survive but without necessariesin someone's life then the person cant survive .. in general memang cant survive overall .. but in relationship .. without luxury we can still survive mentally happy .. ham fuk n etc .. but without necessaries then we cant survive MENTALLY .. it's like u've just lost everything and need to stand up and start everything all over again . even if u can strat everything , it'll still be in ur mind until the day u die .. haiz.. sadness of life .. this is love .. love can bring u happiness at times or forever but can also brings u sadness of life forever .. how wish if we can last long like my friend, jen's sis .. couple for 7 years or my 'collegues' last for six years n she's one year younger than me .. haihz .. this will never happen in the relationship .. i felt so damn CHEAP .. haihz .. sadness of life .. well .. now i still havent break up .. so maybe i should just appreciate the remaining days rite ? haha .. haihz .. but feel better aftercrying like mad .. haihz ..well .. everytime we quarrel he confirm can still sleep like a pig .. this shows that how much he loves me .. haihz .. i really annot sleep .. u know everyday when i'm working i'll miss him .. think of him like mad , then i'll hope for time to pass faster so that i can go home n chat with him .. haihz .. everyday come back damn tired but when talking to him i wont feel tired .. haihz